Apr. 22, 2020

DON'T OPEN YOUR MOUTH UNLESS YOUR AN EXPERT ON SEX!!!

In 1984--- determined to save my dying home town, Pine Bluff, Arkansas---I formally announced as a candidate for Mayor. Between my ex-husband and his family AND the Clintons and the Democrat Party, there were two team of spiteful haters-- both determined to bring me down.

One of the nastiest, low-life “pranks” I was forced to endure every day were the no-name calls to my campaign headquarters.  Whoever answered the phone was asked about my sexual preference--- if the rumors were true-- that I was a Lesbian.  There were no-such rumors.  It was merely a very-nasty political ploy to discredit me, destroy my reputation, and attack my character.

The day I stood on the steps of Pine Bluff’s Convention Center to announce I wasn’t a Lesbian-- was a stressful day. My parents were the only people standing with me; my volunteers and supporters stayed far away. To my knowledge no woman or, in fact, any Miss Arkansas—in the history of Arkansas politics— had ever uttered the word “Lesbian” in a press conference. I issued my statement—late morning—to only two reporters yet, by that evening, every radio and TV station in Arkansas carried the story as “Breaking News” at 6 and 10 p.m.

Several months later, I appeared on a local talk-radio show. The call-in phone lines were packed with people wanting to express themselves-- support my run for Mayor-- denounce me-- challenge me-- and bombard me with questions and comments. I wasn’t surprised when one older-sounding woman called to chastise me for having a press conference and actually speaking the word....Lesbian…in public.

She proudly announced she had contacted the Miss Arkansas Pageant to “report” me and to suggest they take-back both my crown and my title. After sufficiently beating-me-up with harsh words and threats, the older woman seemed satisfied and was about to hang-up--- when she remembered a question she wanted to ask. I still remember her exact words: “Not that I’m really interested but tell me—how in the world can two women, with the same body parts, have sex? And, how can the two of you have an ORGANISM?”

Trying to be respectful and not laugh, I said “Ma’am, as I told you before, I am not a Lesbian. I have no idea how Lesbians have sex but, I am curious. As a heterosexual, I understand an ORGASM but never once—in all my life—have I had an ORGANISM. Please, my friend, tell me what I’ve been missing.”

The older woman screamed and slammed down the phone. The show host, overcome with laughter, quickly went to a commercial.

Sally Miller